mmq 近日，武汉大学名为《恋爱心理学》的讲座爆火，小小的课堂装不下同学们对知识（恋爱）的向往。
来晚的同学一度爬上窗台、蹲在过道、挤满教室门口，“我排着队，拿着爱的号码牌”……一起感受这场沉浸式谈恋爱：
A lecture on love has become wildly popular in Wuhan University recently, with photos of the packed class circulating widely on social media — students were seen huddling at windows and forming long lines for the talk of the campus.
“这是对爱情的渴望”
这场引爆全场的讲座由武汉大学哲学学院心理学系教授喻丰授课，他平时经常做积极心理学研究，由于“大学生日常生活中也会很关心爱情”，所以把爱情心理学搬到了课堂上。
“The Beauty of Love”, presented by Professor Yu Feng from the School of Philosophy, ignited students’ passion for knowledge by applying psychology to the practice of intimate relations.
喻丰老师表示，同学们意外高涨的热情让他感到惊喜，“这是对恋爱的渴望，是对心理学知识的渴求，当然也是对我个人的鼓励”。
“The popularity of the class reflects students’ longing for love and eagerness for psychological knowledge,” said Yu. “For me, it’s also a form of personal encouragement.”
看到听课场面如此火爆，武汉大学再三提醒：知识虽好，但也要注意安全！
如何谈一场健康的恋爱
“希望大家谈一场健康的恋爱，开始并且保持一段积极的关系”，是喻丰老师开设讲座的初衷。
The purpose of the class is to help college students understand what goes behind a healthy, romantic relationship.
讲座以爱情心理学的基本理论为主，结合谈恋爱的过程——寻找对象、开始、结束或者保持等，一层层地揭开“爱情”的神秘面纱。
具体为：“爱是什么”，走近不同类型的爱情；“为何要爱”，从生理和心理两个维度注释爱意的萌生；“为何会爱”，一起探究彼此吸引的不唯一法则；“如何去爱”，辨别、追求、保持、分手，让“积极”贯穿相恋的全程。
Based on psychological theory, the lecture aims to answer important questions about love — what it is, why it occurs and how to go about it, in a progressive manner.
据武汉大学微信公众号介绍，喻丰老师把健康的恋爱关系定义为“两人都能照顾到对方而不是自私的，都为自己和对方的二元关系考虑，有亲密的感觉又有互相的承诺，还能一直保有最初的感觉”。
According to the university’s official WeChat account, Yu’s definition of healthy love is selfless interaction between the couple; with both sides enjoying and maintaining intimate feelings in line with mutual commitment, unlike the fading of an initial crush.
真正的爱意不是纯粹的感性，“它不应该是基于廉价感动进行冲动选择后的认知失调。某种程度上，爱也是互相适应、互相迁就、互相妥协，它是相互成全而非一味付出或者收获”。
True love, however, isn’t cognitive dissonance as a result of being emotionally moved. In some ways, it should involve two-way adaptation, compromise and achievement.
针对同学们的恋爱困惑，喻老师也提出了一些“防病”小妙招（tips on how to eschew a toxic relationship），帮助大家收获甜甜的爱情。
❶ 识别和拒绝消极关系，拒绝PUA！
Stay away from gaslighting, or being manipulated by your counterpart
❷ 保持相互之间的了解，要保持通畅而有实质性的沟通
Keep effective communication to know more about your loved one
❸ 扩大社交圈，寻找真正让你心动的人
Extend your social circle to find your real love
有幸挤进了课堂的同学们表示，听完课想谈恋爱了，不少网友更是纷纷“催更”，预约下一期。
“In addition to lecturing on theories, he uses lively cases and plenty of visual tools. I like his course more than other professors’ classes.”
除了会用幽默风趣的语气讲解恋爱心理学知识外，也会穿插有趣好笑的例子和GIF动图，比平时上的课有趣多了！
部分同学课后也开启了深刻的思考……
“I’ve learned to understand love in a different mindset. Most people perceive love via their feelings, but his class told us to approach it through psychology. The most important thing for lovers is to seek common ground because it can raise their level of communication.”
从不一样的角度去看待爱情问题。大部分人在日常生活中对爱的感知就是情绪上的感受与思维上的考量，但是当我们从学术化的角度对情形进行分析的时候，从心理学角度去看待感性的爱情，我们已经是理论中人了。
目前，全国多所高校已开设“恋爱心理”相关课程，并受到学生们追捧。对感情和性的认识不能仅停留在生理卫生知识层面，用科学理性的方式打开一段亲密关系，你准备好了吗？
编辑：焦洁 陈月华
来源：武汉大学微信公众号 中国青年报
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